Lordy Lordy Look Who Is 40

Yes I am posting again. What's 6 months or so? I am convinced it is just a number. I don't feel 40 nor do I think I look 40. Granted I don't look 30 but not 40. LOL! I had an amazing weekend with my friends and family. I am so blessed I can't even put it into words. I know it is easy to get bogged down and depressed with day to day issues but when it comes down to it I am the luckiest girl in the world. Here is to the next 40!
Take care,
Raye

Doug & I

My amazing friends and family

William's Turn

Well the #1 son now is sans tonsils like little brother. I am praying this will help with the strep issue. Treating strep on average 6 times a year is not fun. I really don't like giving the boys antibiotics and having to give William some that often was not ideal. If you ever have a child in the hospital for any length of time you will see what effect antibacterial products and over use of antibiotics are having on us. Kind of scary. But I digress. William was originally okay with the idea but as surgery date loomed closer he got nervous. He even picked out a new pair of pjs and ice cream just for this occasion. What a nut. He did really good during surgery and was better than I thought coming out from anesthesia. He had a little rough time when we first got home but I think that had more to do with the anesthesia. I swear under tears I heard him say "why did this have to happen to me today?". Could that have pierced my heart anymore? Man. But I know this is going to be great going forward. After getting mine out at 17, yes I said 17, I have not had issues with the throat. Knock on wood. He is doing much better today. We are getting him to eat food which I hope will give him more energy and he hasn't had his prescription pain meds since last night. So far only Tylenol is keeping pain at bay. I think the funniest thing is this ice cream he really wanted he really hasn't eaten. He had one serving and that's it. What a nut!
Take care,
Raye

PS. William on the giggle juice is possibly the funniest thing I have seen. I really hope that is not an indicator of how he will act intoxicated. LOL!!

After giggle juice and getting Zelda 3D for the 3DS.
He could hardly hold it not long after this picture.

Trying to wake up. Poor Baby.

Rolling in the really big wheelchair

Yeah for Dad's truck and it's bench seat.

Feeling much better after a good nap!

Cherish

Around the corner I have a friend,
In this great city that has no end,
Yet the days go by and weeks rush on,
And before I know it, a year is gone.
And I never see my old friends face,
For life is a swift and terrible race,
He knows I like him just as well,
As in the days when I rang his bell.
And he rang mine but we were younger then,
And now we are busy, tired men.
Tired of playing a foolish game,
Tired of trying to make a name.
'Tomorrow' I say! 'I will call on Jim.
Just to show that I'm thinking of him.'
But tomorrow comes and tomorrow goes,
And distance between us grows and grows.
Around the corner, yet miles away,
'Here's a telegram sir,' ' Jim died today.'
And that's what we get and deserve in the end.
Around the corner, a vanished friend.

March for Babies 2011

Boy. Our March for Babies team has certainly grown this year. From the humble beginnings of Ginny starting this team in April '05 in honor of Parker & Tanner to today with 22 people walking. Now we aren't the largest family team but we are there that is for sure. We even got new shirts this year. Yeah us! While this is a stressful time it is also a fun time. Poor Tilsons and crew kind of get outnumbered by the Batchelor Crew but that is okay. The more the merrier right! Our team raised over $2,000 for our team. I can't wait until some of the kids get older and we can get them raising money too. It was a great day even thought it was a little chilly that morning but that made it really nice on the walk. We got real lucky with the weather. All in all it was a great day!
Take care!
Raye

This years walkers

Our new shirts

The Harrison Crew

Ryan's Spot in the Garden of Hope

Jake's spot in the Garden of Hope

Crazy Jake is 5

A little late but better than never! Wow. "Baby" Jake is 5. Where has the time gone? Where has the year gone? He is about to start kindergarten and is playing flag football. He is such a little interesting kid to say the least. He can be the sweetest thing in the world and then turn around and be the devil. But that is what makes him Jake. We wouldn't have him any other way. Happy Birthday my crazy little guy! Love you bunches!
Take care,
Raye

Blowing out candles

First practice

My Valentine

If there were no words
No way to speak
I would still hear you

If there were no tears
No way to feel inside
I'd still feel for you

And even if the sun refuse to shine
Even if romance ran out of rhyme
You would still have my heart
Until the end of time
You're all i need
My love, my valentine

All of my life
I have been waiting for
All you give to me
You've opened my eyes
And showed me how to love unselfishly

I've dreamed of this a thousand times before
In my dreams i couldnt love you more
I will give you my heart
Until the end of time
You're all i need
My love, my valentine

La da da
Da da da da

And even if the sun refuse to shine
Even if romance ran out of rhyme
You would still have my heart
Until the end of time
Cuz all i need
Is you, my valentine

You're all i need
My love, my valentine

Sweet Little Jakey

I go from not blogging for two months to three in two days. Man. Anyway meant to share this sweet story about my little Jake. I know I wrote about the feelings I was having concerning Ryan and what not but I had not shared them with the boys or even Doug for that matter. But last night I was making dinner and Jake came up to me with his Dd (blanket) all rolled up. He told me it was Baby Ryan like he was Jakey Ryan. He then proceeded to tell me that Ryan died and I said yes he did. He then said you miss him Mommy don't you and I said yes I did. He then said he was going to put him in my bed so I could sleep with him and Daddy too. All night he took that blanket around like a baby. He sat on the couch and held it and when he went to bed he blamed not going to sleep on Baby Ryan crying. That little nut. He can be so sweet and such a little punk. But I wouldn't trade it for anything.

Take care,
Raye

The Brave Little Soul

Found this on the Caring Bridge site for our former insurance salesman's son. He passed away February after a 3 year long battle with cancer. I still struggle to this day with why the Lord would allow an innocent soul to suffer. One day I will be at peace with that concept.
((hugs))

The Brave Little Soul By: John Alessi
Not too long ago in Heaven there was a little soul who took wonder in observing the world. He especially enjoyed the love he saw there and often expressed this joy with God. One day however the little soul was sad, for on this day he saw suffering in the world. He approached God and sadly asked, "Why do bad things happen; why is there suffering in the world?" God paused for a moment and replied, "Little soul, do not be sad, for the suffering you see, unlocks the love in people's hearts." The little soul was confused. "What do you mean," he asked. God replied, "Have you not noticed the goodness and love that is the offspring of that suffering? Look at how people come together, drop their differences and show their love and compassion for those who suffer. All their other motivations disappear and they become motivated by love alone." The little soul began to understand and listened attentively as God continued, "The suffering soul unlocks the love in people's hearts much like the sun and the rain unlock the flower within the seed. I created everyone with endless love in their heart, but unfortunately most people keep it locked up and hardly share it with anyone. They are afraid to let their love shine freely, because they are afraid of being hurt. But a suffering soul unlocks that love. I tell you this - it is the greatest miracle of all. Many souls have bravely chosen to go into the world and suffer - to unlock this love - to create this miracle for the good of all humanity."
Just then the little soul got a wonderful idea and could hardly contain himself. With his wings fluttering, bouncing up and down, the little soul excitedly replied. "I am brave; let me go! I would like to go into the world and suffer so that I can unlock the goodness and love in people's hearts! I want to create that miracle!" God smiled and said, "You are a brave soul I know, and thus I will grant your request. But even though you are very brave you will not be able to do this alone. I have known since the beginning of time that you would ask for this and so I have carefully selected many souls to care for you on your journey. Those souls will help you create your miracle; however they will also share in your suffering. Two of these souls are most special and will care for you, help you and suffer along with you, far beyond the others. They have already chosen a name for you". God and the brave soul shared a smile, and then embraced.
In parting, God said, "Do not forget little soul that I will be with you always. Although you have agreed to bear the pain, you will do so through my strength. And if the time should come when you feel that you have suffered enough, just say the word, think the thought, and you will be healed." Thus at that moment the brave little soul was born into the world, and through his suffering and God's strength, he unlocked the goodness and love in people's hearts. For so many people dropped their differences and came together to show their love. Priorities became properly aligned. People gave from their hearts. Those that were always too busy found time. Many began new spiritual journeys, some regained lost faith - many came back to God. Parents hugged their children tighter. Friends and family grew closer. Old friends got together and new friendships were made. Distant family reunited, and every family spent more time together. Everyone prayed. Peace and love reigned. Lives changed forever. It was good. The world was a better place. The miracle had happened. God was pleased.

Lake Travis Adventure Pt1

What a great start to the weekend. On our way down to Lake Travis we stopped at Whitney to see Doug's parents. We had a nice lunch and it was good to see them. We hadn't seen them since Christmas. Downtown Whitney had great character. Found a great wall to take the boys picture. William posed like a little model. Cracked me up. Once we finally got through Round Rock traffic we arrived at the rent house. Rustic is the first thing that came to mind. Not exactly what I was expecting. It is clean and has all the amenities but kind of jungle. This area reminds me a lot of LA up in the hills. Nice houses squeezed onto a small lot on winding roads with smaller more rustic homes in between. But the boys like it so that is the important thing. They slept well last night but I can't say the same for Doug. He should be fine the rest of the time. Doug & i sat on one of the decks last night. We read, watched the lights on the lake and had tasty beverages. It was great. Will continue with Pt 2 tomorrow. The only thing we have planned today is a trip to the park and Iguana Grill.
Take care!
Raye

Mother's Day 2010

What a great day. Actually a great weekend. Saturday was a little stressful but fun. Got to eat at Central Market with my boys and then off to Jake's Loft. Love me some Jake's Loft. Got to see Courtney and Lil Teri and their crew at Jake's. I so wish William's soccer game hadn't got moved. We would have had a blast at CM drinking some wine. After William's game we headed on over to Mary's for a cookout with my Mom and Oma. Boy was Mom surprised when Mike opened the door. He came in from Cali to surprise her. Sunday was all mine. I got to sleep in until 8. Woot! Yes 8 is sleeping in for the Harrison's. I have no idea why my boys can't sleep in. Even if they go to bed really late their happy butts are still up by 8 at the latest. I am sure they will grow out of that at some point. Hopefully. My amazing boys got me an iPad for a gift. It was completely unexpected. I was thinking a spa day was in my future. It has been so much fun playing with it. It is like crack. Rachel please step away from the pipe. It was off to Don Taco for lunch where we completely pigged out and off to soccer, again. The season that never ends. The best part was that I got to spend time with my boys doing what I wanted, well almost. The greatest gift Doug ever gave me was those three amazing boys. I stand amazed when I look into William and Jake's face and remember Ryan. I did that. Well with some help. I have wanted since I was a little girl to be a Mommy. Not just to have a living doll but someone that was a part of me. I couldn't wait to teach them their ABC's or colors or about the stars. It is just wonderful. And that poem is so true. To be a Mom is to accept that your heart will walk around outside of your body for the rest of your life. I just pray they will always have room in theirs for me.
Much Love to all the Moms!
Raye

Crazy boys

Kisses for Mom

March for Babies - Honoring My Preemies!

Click here to help me reach my goal!

Members In A Club We Never Wanted To Join

Today was Jake's birthday party but it was also an anniversary for a fellow Angel Mommy. Today was Carleigh's 1st Angelversary. Carliegh was born sleeping one year ago today. My heart goes out to Holly especially since we are coming up on our 5th on Friday. I am blessed I know these women but I hate that I met these woman being a member of this club. Never in a million years did I think I would be in this club. It stinks and sometimes I just want to scream. But then I stop take a deep breath and realize how blessed I truly am in this world. Unlike Holly who had to say goodbye while she was saying hello I got these amazing 9 weeks and 6 days with Ryan. That is a blessing that I will always remember. Here is to Holly and all the Angel Parents out there. We are members of this club we never wanted to join but we have each other. Either online or down the street we are always here for each other.
((hugs)),
Raye

Getting ready to release

Off it goes

Happy Birthday "Baby" Jake!

What a great day yesterday. My little guy turned 4. I know I talk about this all the time but it is hard and amazing watching them grow up. My baby is four. He will be in Kindergarten not his fall but next. We started the day with Birthday Breakfast. His choice was French Toast Sticks. He got to open his cards and his present from Mom & Dad while he waited for his breakfast. In the midst of eating his breakfast he told Doug it was the best breakfast. He is such a nut. He wanted to wear his Link costume top to Shayla's so he got to wear that and his hat. Thank you Shayla for sparing it from the cupcakes. That icing was very messy. He was very excited. Since he is now 4 he got to play on the top of the small play structure at Shayla's. Boy does he think that is cool. William had skills class so once they finally called it because of weather we went to dinner. Jake chose Pizza Hut. Thank the Lord we were not stuck at McDonald's or Burger King. When we got home Jake started to turn the light off over the table and getting a chair ready. I asked him what he was doing and he said getting ready to blow the candles out. I guess he has learned the routine in the Harrison household. We finished the night with Jake requesting another birthday breakfast. Guess he wants his day to just go on and on. But who doesn't?

Birthday Breakfast. Nice bed head

Jake showing off one of his presents. William gives the thumbs up.

Blowing out the candles. Yes he still has the costume on.

William reading one of Jake's books to him and Pepper.

Happy Birthday Doug!

The last of the Harrison birthdays for the moment. Doug turned the big 39 on Friday. Thank goodness Jake's birthday is in March. Having four of us in two weeks time is crazy. I remember when Ryan was born everyone was like can you give us a break here. I tried to arrange to give Doug a great day off which worked for the most part. But work ended up making him do something. But all in all he said he had a great day. He and I ate lunch together at his fav fish taco place. Believe it or not he did not have fish tacos that day. We finished the day by having dinner at Pizza Hut. We love the Pizza Hut in Roanoke. They have great service and the pizza are hot. Everyone got along and everything so it was a great weekend.

Take care!
Raye

The Birthday Boy and his crew

Prematurity Awareness Day

Why I Walk

So others won't know the pain we've known
This is why we walk
So every child has a chance
This is why we walk
For Tanner, Parker and Myles
This is why we walk
For Ryan & Jake
This is why I walk


The US is failing it's youngest most fragile population. Prematurity can happen to any woman. It is not just a socioeconomic issue. It is a global issue with the US not doing so hot in the statistics. It is said it takes a village to raise a child.It appears we are not doing well in that respect. People think well it is not my child so why should I care? Well let me tell you. If you live in Tarrant County you help pay for those born too soon. Having been a volunteer in the NICU at Cook's I saw those babies in that unit that were transferred from JPS. Even if you look at it from an economic perspective an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. You would also be surprised by the ones prematurity does strike. I had great prenatal care and still had two babies early. Even though I did everything "right" they still came in this world before their time. What was really hard to watch was after Ryan was born I watched someone smoke and drink during their pregnancy and their son by all accounts seems fine. That is why the mission of the March of Dimes is so important. They work tirelessly to get to the bottom of these complex issues. Next time you think not my child think about your neighbors, friends, fellow church members or your coworker. Someone you know has been touched by prematurity. If you are reading this you know me and so you definitely know someone that has been touched by prematurity. Band Together. Help the helpless. And now I will get off my soapbox. Thank you to everyone who supports us and our passion for the March of Dimes. Words will never be able to express our gratitude for every one's support over the last almost five years. Wow. Five Years. That is another post for another day.

((hugs)),
Raye

6 weeks too soon - Ryan

4 weeks too soon - Jake

March for Babies - 2009 Awards Lunch

Oh my. Has it really been over two months since I last posted. What a slacker. I promise to be better. On Monday we attended the Fort Worth March for Babies Luncheon. We weren't in the top 5 but that is ok. We missed it by that much. I am still floored over the amount of support we had this year. Especially in shaky financial times like we are experiencing. Dr. Grubbs was the emcee so that was really cool. You know I love me some Dr. Grubbs. I have learned not to rush up to him if I see him in public. We do see him at least once a year at the Warm Place fundraiser. I let him talk to us which he did. I got my usual big hug from him. He is such a wonderful and gentle man. Cook's is lucky to have him and the parents of the children he cares for are also lucky. Mom & Doug went with us this year so that was fun. We sat next to Amber Augustin and her team. They are the Extreme Makeover family. It was nice to meet her and she seemed nice. All in all it was a great lunch once again. Can't wait for 2010. I will get on with creating the Miracle Munchkins store so everyone can get their Munchkin items. Yeah for us!
Take care,
Raye


Our name badges with program

Me & Teri Lyn

Dr. Grubbs

Mom, Teri Lyn & I

March for Babies - 2009

Yesterday was a great day. The weather was kind of gross but NO RAIN!! Yeah. Big T actually walked this year. He did great. He and the other boys got a little crazy but whatcha gonna do with that many boys together? This year we finished pretty much in the middle of the pack. It was awesome. It was 10:05 and we were at the finish line. Yeah for us! I hope next year is as fun. Thank you to all who supported us by giving. We really appreciate it.

Have a great week,
Raye

Doug and I at the end of the course

Emily & William

Jake chillin' in his stroller

Azleland

Today we finally went out to visit Ryan. I honestly think it has been almost a year since we were there. Being there today really brought it out how much I want to move him. And Dad for that matter. I need to have a conversation with the caretaker. The ground is in such bad shape everything is sinking. He has only been there for just shy of four years and he is already starting to sink. At least they raised Dad's. The place is just so country bumpkin'. Ryan is right under a bush and power lines just on the other side of their maintenance area. I was taking pictures and I noticed and old Ford tailgate. All I could think is really?? I appreciate my family stepping in and helping in those days. I could not have gotten all that together without them. But I am just not happy with him under that bush. It just seems odd. But the important thing is he and Dad are in the same place. Now if I can just get my butt up there more. One really sweet thing was with Jake. I kissed my hand and then touched the marker. William saw me and did the same thing and then told Jake to do it as well. So Jake proceeds to bend over and kiss the marker directly. He is crazy. He understood we went to see Baby Ryan but he has no clue who Baby Ryan is at this point. I tell him he is his brother but I think he is still too young to get it. He will soon enough.
Take care,
Raye

William & Jake helping clean up the marker

The tail gate

The property next to Azleland

Extreme Makeover Home Edition

This morning Becky and I went to be apart of Extreme Makeover Home Edition. I don't know if all of you know but they are filming just down from my house. I was really hacked on Monday because it blocked my direct route to and from work. Ok. I am still hacked about that. But I need to be charitable. Anyway. Teri Lyn forwarded me an email that she got from our local March Of Dimes person (Kimberly) that talked about how MOD is going to be apart of this build. The owner had preemie and now she tries to help. I asked Kimberly about dates and joked with her about showing up in my Miracle Munchkins shirt to support the March of Dimes. Low and behold she sent me an email telling me how to be apart of the filming this morning. What we did was film the "Braveheart" walk. Basically the part of the show that has all the people marching up to the house. It was so cold. We had to be there at 6:30. I am still cold. Spec and I left at 9:30 after we completed most of the filming because she was having frozen toe issues. I tried to get shots of the cast but the crew did not want us to take pictures while they were filming. They threatened to pull us out of line. So I snuck the pictures when I could. Teri Lyn and I are going to try and go see the construction progress this weekend. Move the Bus day is Monday but I don't think I will be able to make that. Darn it. That would be fun. Here are some pictures. You will see we looked like stuffed sausages because they made us put the shirts on top of our coats. I was amazed they went on. I will post again with more pictures when I go this weekend.
Take care,
Raye

Banner we all carried

Spec & I - Man were we cold

Spec all bundled up - Still didn't help her feet

Ty talking to the "cowboys"

Ty walking back to the van - He was hard to shoot

Birthdays, Birthdays

Boy this time of year is busy for birthdays. Rachel is on the 1st, Becky, Tanner & Parker are on the 2nd plus Doug's and mine Anniversary is on that day. Goodness. We put up the tree on Sunday but didn't decorate until Monday night. It is so cute. Jake put on his Santa hat and started running around the house saying Ho Ho Ho. I know it is hard to imagine Jake running around the house but the hat was adorable. He is so much more into this than William was or is. He must take after his Mom. The tree has many ornaments near the bottom in the front of the tree. Hazards of the decorators. I would not have it any other way.


Brotherly love

William giving Willy smooches. I understand the irony of the name

Jake snuggling with Chex

Chex & Willy - You can just see Chex's lights on his antlers